what a relief. finally making it public that we’ve separated. at least we ended things and are still friends. though, i will miss all the great memories and will eventually mope around again, i’ll get over it. maybe being just friends is better than dating.

What if this really is the end..

He’s a couple hours early because he couldn’t stay up. But he is absolutely the most sweetest boy ever. I’m so glad to have him in my life. 💖 Happy early one year :)

I can’t tell you things aren’t alright, because then it’d be like I’m holding you back from something you’ve wanted to do for such a long time. So i’ll just promise you things are okay and smile like nothing’s wrong, as long as you’re happy, right?

I miss those nights where we used to talk till 4am about anything in the world. What’s happening to us.

Finally being able to see you after a long three weeks was so amazing. When you were finally able to hold me into your arms I felt safe again. I wanted to burst into tears because you were with me. I missed you so much. It had hit me that you complete my entire life. You make me happy and no matter what you always are there for me. I’m glad I got to spend time with you. Even though if was only for a short while. That short while was worth it. I hope to not leave you again my love

I was jumped and abused by my teammates at color guard rehearsal , but excluding that, I had a decent birthday.  

To me, it’s not a good thing. ESPECIALLY in a relationship. Becoming extremely jealous can ruin things for the two of you or others close to you. You may not want them talking to their best friend because they once had a thing, or that best friend likes your significant other, and your significant other may tell you it’s nothing. But after jealousy sets in, it always seems like something. And no matter what they say, you will feel as if you’re going to lose them…

New Year’s Day was spent with my wonderful boyfriend. Unfortunately, I kinda ruined the night since I had a little too much to drink. I don’t remember much except that I was cussing everyone out, singing extremely loud, complaining that my cousin didn’t show up, and crying about him still liking another girl. I never really planned on my night being like that, but I kept thinking about a year ago and how stupid of an idiot I was falling for this guy who fucked with my feelings. So I just wanted to drink the pain away, ya know. Well, I went over board on that. I ended up crying for half an hour saying things like, “he doesn’t love me! He’s with Rachel. He’s just gonna hurt me like Joaquin.” I don’t really know what came over me to start saying things like that. But Francesca was able to calm me down and forget for a while. That didn’t last long tho. When she KOed, I started thinking again and then got extremely mad at Luis for reasons I don’t even remember. I know I can’t take what happened back, but if I could, I would in a heart beat. I really wish that that night, I didn’t agree to drink. So after today, no more alcohol until I’m able to handle myself completely.
So Luis, if you ever find this. I hope you know that I am extremely sorry that you had to put up with my bullshit.

thisisshenanigans:

I love kissing. I love the way they feel, I love the sighs and moans that follow. I love the small pauses and teases for more. I love the small taste of tongue that brush together occasionally. I love the wandering hands. I like biting. I like pulling. I like running my tongue lightly across their bottom lip. I like the little laughs when its almost too good and you can’t help yourself. Idk. Making out as a whole is just pretty great.

(Source: drippingiingold, via ohdamnitszach)